Let me preface this post by saying I cannot take a good picture to save my life. I swear, 98% of all pictures taken of me absolutely suck, I cannot smile on demand for some reason, I am just retarded like that. I am also a big fat whale of a person and that is going to be fixed very shortly.

Since my recent unemployment the need to shave has gone way down on my list of priorities. On my list of things to do before I die one of the things was to grow a beard so I decided to just go ahead and do it. I hadn’t shaved since I got back from Japan, and I probably didn’t shave the last couple days I was in Japan either so I had some good growth going.

My facial hair, hell, all the hair on my head is pretty thin so I can’t grow the worlds greatest beard but I pulled something that resembled a beard off. Anyway here is a picture of the beard.

God I hate pictures of myself, and that one is probably the best one of the bunch here. I was headed out to Christmas dinner at my brothers in-laws so I decided to clean up and shave it all off. I decided to have a bit of fun first and shaved down to a goatee. It didn’t look too bad, just not thick enough and not really me. Here is me with a goat.

I then decided to see if I could ever pursue a career in law enforcement and went down to just a moustache. I think there are probably about 11 men on the planet that can pull off just having a moustache, I am obviously not one of those men. It looked absolutely ridiculous.

If you are a Scrubs fan then I am sure you will get a kick out of this, it’s really well done. For you non Scrubs fans, I am not sure how this will go over with you, you will still probably find it funny though.

This guy is obviously some sort of ninja.

I am having a bit of a hard time getting back on California time after my trip to Japan.

The first day I got home I had left Japan at 7:00PM Japan time and landed here in CA at 10:30AM. I was able to force myself, with a bit of difficulty, to stay up till 10:00PM that night before I crashed. I slept like a rock that first night and slept till 12:30PM the next day. I was hoping that doing that would get me pretty close to being back on track, I was wrong. That night I went to bed around 2:00AM, fell asleep probably around 3:00AM and woke back up around 4:00AM. When I woke up, before looking at the clock, I thought I had been asleep for at least 6 hours so I was quite surprised to see it had only been an hour, I was also wide awake. I tried falling back asleep but it was futile, I finally got out of bed around 6:00AM and started doing stuff around the house. By the time 10:00AM rolled around I was exhausted so I lied down to take a nap, before I knew it it was 4:00PM. I was screwed.

I tried going to bed around 3:00 that night but it was worthless, I couldn’t fall asleep to save my life. I tried taking a couple advil and drinking some milk but that didn’t do a damn thing. I ended up being awake till 10:30AM before I was able to fall asleep, I set my alarm for 1:00PM but I some how turned it off and didn’t get up. I ended up waking up at 5:00PM, things are really looking up for me here.

I was determined to not have a repeat of yesterday’s performance the next night, I didn’t mind what time I fell asleep. I can’t really make myself fall asleep when I am not tired so if I was going to catch up on sleep it most likely meant cutting some sleep short so I would get tired earlier the next sleep cycle. I ended up being awake all night again and finally was able to fall asleep at 9:00AM. I set my alarm before I fell asleep though. My alarm went off at 1:30PM and this time I didn’t turn it off, I did snooze till 2:00PM but I was making progress, I only got 5 hours of sleep.

This brings us up to last night. I went to bed around 3:30AM and was actually able to fall asleep relatively quickly, I was probably asleep by 4:00-4:30AM. Unfortunately for me, I slept till 2:00PM. I didn’t have this much trouble in Japan and everyone told me that it was easier to get back on track than adjust to the new time zone, I think they are filthy liars. I just want to go back to falling asleep between 1:00-2:00AM and getting up around 8:00-9:00AM.

Maybe I should just drink myself into a stupor so that I pass out early one night.

This is probably the most subtle one that I have done, hope you like it.

Here is the image I started with, can you spot the seven changes I made?

Click Here for bigger versions of the original and the changed images

I am home from Japan safe and sound. I have been writing up on my trip over at moesrealm.com The links are up yet so if you want to see it go to here. Days 1 through 13 are up right now and I plan on finishing up the rest over the next couple of days. Please note that the pages linked to above are pretty rough, they haven’t been proofread and some of them still need pictures and details filled in. I am just giving my readers here a bit of a sneak peak. I will make another post when things are up for real.

The trip was really amazing and I can’t wait to go back. I actually got home yesterday but I was stupidly tired. I took off from Japan at 7:00PM on Monday and landed in San Francisco at 10:30AM Monday. I wasn’t really able to sleep on the plane so by the time I had landed I had been up for about 19 hours, I really wanted to get back on CA time ASAP so I stayed up till ten last night when I crashed hard. I slept till 12:30 this afternoon, hopefully it won’t take me long to get back on CA time, it took me nearly a week to get on Japan time.

Anyway, I am glad to be home but I had an incredible time and drank a boat load of beer.

I took the following picture and changed seven things within it with Photoshop, can you find them?

Click Here for bigger versions of the original and the changed images

Something about the guy on the right cracks me up. I am not sure if it’s just because he is the only one with a penis in the picture, or if it’s because he brought his camera, or that he is standing off to the side like he is afraid to join the women or maybe the women don’t want him there. Maybe it’s because he just peed on the sidewalk. Anyway, he cracks me up.