So I went and saw Terrence Malick’s (”Days of Heaven” “The Thin Red Line” “Badlands”) latest film The New World over the weekend. If you aren’t familiar with the movie it tells the story of Pocahontas. When I first started seeing previews for this movie a few weeks ago I wasn’t at all excited, it just didn’t make a good impression on me. The more I saw the preview the more I felt this way. Then the professional reviews started coming out and quite a few people were raving about it. I happen to be a big Roger Ebert fan, I find I agree with his taste in films more often than not, and he gave this film 4 stars, his highest rating. If you are curious you can read his review here

Since it was getting good press and Ebert liked it I figured I would give it a fair shot. The movie is stunningly beautiful to look at. It is up for the best cinematography Oscar and deserves to be. The acting is quite good too. I was especially impressed with newcomer Q’Orianka Kilcher who plays Pocahontas (her character’s name is never mentioned in the movie). Q’Orianka was only 14 when the movie was shot (further proof that I am going to hell for being a dirty old man) and I found her completely believable in the role with a very natural grace. The other actors; Colin Farrell, Christian Bale, Christopher Plummer and a bunch of other people I didn’t recognize or don’t remember do a fine job as well.

With that out of the way; I absolutely hated this film. I should have followed my gut and not bothered with it. While I agree with many of the things that Ebert says in his review such as the awe that the Indians must have felt as they saw the English boats and the awe the English must have felt seeing their first natives or how much of the film is implied rather than spelled out. It just didn’t work for me. The movie is very light on dialog, not always a bad thing but here it just adds to the snooze fest. Another aspect of this movie that I loathed was the music. Imagine a donkey yelling in your backyard as you try to fall asleep, that’s about how enjoyable the music in this movie was. The music was done by James Horner who I usually don’t have any problem with.

Avoid this one folks or just watch it on mute and enjoy the scenery.